Blog #1

YOU KNOW WHAT I HATE?

When girls on MySpace do one of those generic MySpace poses. You know the ones, and so do I. So I decided to break it down for you guys.

POSE #1: The Bathroom Mirror.
Oh, the classic "mirror pic". And you know it's going to be taken in the bathroom because nobody walks into somebody in there. You could be using the toilet! But 9 times out of 10, they'll be taking pictures. I always found it weird because, you can find out what is in someone's bathroom by looking through their pictures. So here's the rundown of what they are wearing. Sweat pants with the waist folded down to reveal their mid section. Then they put on a low cut tank top. They're hair is either wet, or a total mess to try to make it look "scene". And then they throw up the peace sign. As if they're saying "I really think war is stupid", or "Dude, I'm totally baked.". Then the comments are up to like 43 because their one friend in Biology is commenting it, and pressed "Post Comment" one too many times, thus making the phrase "wow yer so gorgeous. i wish i was that hot. lol." being posted SO MANY TIMES. Which I always thought was funny because they're confessing they're lesbian love to a girl, yet they would totally deny admitting a girl is sexually attractive to them.

POSE #2: The Bird View
Could someone please let me in on how this became popular? It is absolutely stupid. What they do is take one arm and reach it up to the sky, with the camera in their hand. Then, of course, another low cut shirt showing what the look like down their shirt. Oh and you know they do it on purpose. It's like "I wanna be a whore and show off my cleavage, even though I have a boyfriend". I really hate that. Because you're thinking "Whore." and when you call her that in person, she's offended. I <3 cleavage, but I don't <3 these generic pictures.

POSE #3: Look How Funny I am!
These pictures are very rarely funny. It's usually her and one of her friends doing something at a mall. Either riding one of those old rides where you put in a quarter and gently go up and down on a car. Or it's them in the Disney Store messing around with the stuff there. They'll be sitting on Mickey's lap and having their mouths open and their hand in front of it saying "Look how dirty I am!" Sure, it was funny when you did it in person, but nobody gets the joke on MySpace.

POSE #4: Mommy Doesn't Look At My Pictures, AKA: Jailbait.
Oh, every teenage boy's dream. A hot chick, no pants, underwear, long sleeve shirt. Oh, yes, it's hot. I mean, the girl usually is. But you know for a fact if you were to ask for more pictures, she'd be like "wtffffff i'm not a whorrrrrrrrre." But another thing you can assume from this pic is that she's not a virgin. Another is that her Mom doesn't know, and doesn't check her MySpace account. The guys will comment it saying "Hot!", and what they mean is "I saw you wearing this in a wet dream of mine, but you were naked."


Don't worry, fellas. There's generic MySpace photos for you, Too!

POSE #5: I Lost My Shirt!
The MySpace pose for guys. When they take off there shirt and show off their six pack. The girls will be like "OMG SO HAWT!" and the guys won't comment, unless A) they were there and there is a funny picture taken, or B) They are trying to get tips on how to get that nice of a body. Girls love it, but all guys know one thing, it screams DOUCHEBAG.

Well that's it for now, ladies and gentlemen. Until next time.

I'm Sean, and that's what's eating me.